I'm not sorry anymore.

Boys... For someone who has no real interest in dating, who isn't a "hopeless romantic", I sure seem to write a lot about boys. Especially boys I've loved. Boys who I thought loved me.
One boy I tend to write a lot about. I've beaten myself up for like a year and a half now over him... And right now, at this moment in time, I am so thankful we wrecked our friendship way back when. God really knew how to make THAT turn out for the absolute best.
Even though I'm thankful for being spared as much pain as what I learned today would have caused me, I'm still hurting over this new truth... I can't stop the tears from flowing even now as I type this... But at least now I see the hope in the end. I know that I will overcome this, and I will heal. There is a time, not too far from now, when I won't look back at you with regret.
I honestly believe that if I didn't know what I now know about you, I never would have gotten over you. You'd always taunt my dreams in some form, always be on the back of my mind...
This truth hurts. It hurts a lot. However, because of that supposed mistake we made, I don't have to suffer nearly to the extent I would if we were still together. And with this pain comes freedom.
I only hope and pray you find salvation in the end...



~xHx~