My mind...

My mind is very mathematical. I approach everything with logic, and I can literally debate myself into or out of anything, and I mean anything, if I try hard enough. Just as an example, if I wanted to write an argument that the sky is green, I could make you believe that the sky is green. But first I would have to put myself through a process in making ME believe that the sky is green. My mind would literally debate itself until it believed that the sky is green. Of course, before I did that, I would have to ready myself into a state of being WILLING to accept that the sky is green. This would require wracking my brain on everything I know about the sky being blue, and, not exactly erasing that data from my mind, but turning each one completely upside-down and reversed so that each fact of the sky being blue is questionable. The entire process would put a lot of emotional strain on me, as well as the inability to handle other, regular tasks efficiently. But, once I was through and honestly believed that the sky was green, I could write up such a convincing argument about the sky being green that most people would agree with me.

 And, because I know you're doubtful and you're wanting me to prove myself, no, I am not going to try to make you believe that the sky is green.

You see, there's this other quality that I have. It's the quality that states simply that I need to be there for people. When I'm in the process of convincing myself of something, that part of my brain takes me over completely. I'll argue anything you say that doesn't have logic or reason behind it. Since humans tend to think with our emotions first rather than examining every thought and every reason behind that thought, as you can guess, a lot of what we do and say doesn't have much other than emotion behind it. It still has math(logic) and reason, but that math and reason is based off of the emotion, and therefore the emotions and actions which follow have a great potential to be the incorrect answer to the equation. So, to put it simply, I don't get along well with other people when I'm in this particular state of mind. And when you don't get along with other people, well, it's pretty impossible to be there for them.


There are times when someone might say I'm being illogical, and technically they are not incorrect. I've noticed that my brain also works at a certain level that is above logic. If we view certain aspects of life with only logic, they'll never make sense. Such as, for example, the universe. The universe is very illogical.
Technically, in God's point of view, time doesn't exist. If that's the case, then this life, this world around us, the universe- they don't exist. Not in the sense that we understand the word "exist" to mean, anyhow.

To exist, as we understand it, means to have being in a specified place or time with respect to understood limitations or conditions. If something doesn't operate in the laws of time, it can't exist. The universe isn't confined. It goes on, forever, with no limitations. Therefore, it technically does not EXIST. God's love for us has no limitations, it's purely unconditional, therefore, His love can't exist. God doesn't operate in the laws of time, He has no limitations, He Himself is unconditional. Therefore, technically, even He can't exist.

So, what have I done? Well, basically, I've just used 100% logic, based on the definition of the word "exist", to prove that God doesn't exist. I've also managed to prove that we don't exist, either. But obviously, we do exist. The universe exists, otherwise we wouldn't exist. God exists, otherwise the universe wouldn't exist.

This is purely an example of how limited our human minds really are, and how limited the English language is. The English language leaves no "wiggle room" in its words. Each word has one specific definition, or sometimes multiple definitions, and it is only limited to the definitions it is given. They cannot mean anything other than the definitions they are given. Period.

In order to understand how we, the universe, and God exist, we must scrap all logic and all understanding of the English language. We must be willing to look at things from a completely illogical point of view... but I'm not going to get into that, because it has nothing to do with the point I'm making. (:

As you can see, my mind is very complicated. I have a completely logical, mathematical way of thinking, yet I can look beyond that when it is required of me. I have the advantage of seeing everything from multiple perspectives. It's a gift that God has given me, although it usually feels like a tormenting curse... I have to be extra careful and constantly submit my thoughts to God, because, as you can see, it's just too easy for me to talk myself into or out of anything. Nevertheless, I am thankful for this gift and I will try to use it for His purpose.